Apple: How many iPhones would you buy?

Americans: OMG its like we totally don't know OMG. Maybe we don't believe in knowing how many we need. OMG OMG who are we talking to?

Chinese: Just one. Then we'll make our own. We'll call it XingXiang jPhone 4P with a talking assistant called Piri. Its totally our own idea.

Samsung: No! don't talk to us.

Samsung (to their employees): Quick, start making phones similar to the iPhone. Everyday we must invent at least 20 new handsets in different sizes and forms. And don't forget to put a lot of lights on them.

Indians: We don't know about this iPhone that you talk about. We absolutely don't. Is it a phone? Is it cordless? How much would you charge for it? $300.99 or $300.89?

China: We'll give you the jPhone for $0.89 only.

Siri: Weee weeeeee!

Pakistanis: Did India buy them?

Microsoft: Hmmm lets work together on this iPhone of yours. What say?

Arabs: None! They are not dark blue and golden.

Apple: Ok. How many dark blue and golden iPhones would you buy?

Arabs: None. You have just painted them golden. We need real gold in them.

Apple: Ok. There you go. Real gold iPhones. How many?

Arabs: How many can you supply?

Apple: Depends on your order. 2 billion units at max.

Arabs: How much would you charge per unit?

Apple: $5000 per unit.

Arabs: Huh hahaha so cheap. Lets talk about Apple Inc. How much would you charge for it? Our dignity, our dollars or our oil?? What do you want?

Talibans: آیا آنها منفجر؟ (translation: do they explode?)

Nokia: Our Symbian is way more superior than your iOS.

Apple: Whatever!

Jews: All of them.

Jews (whispering to themselves): We'll make Apple buy them back from us.